Borderline Personality Therapy in San Jose
Build emotional stability and healthier relationships
Borderline Personality Disorder
Understand Deeper Patterns with Therapy for Borderline Personality Disorder
Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) can make emotions and relationships feel unusually intense. You may be highly sensitive to rejection or abandonment, struggle with an unstable sense of yourself, or find that your feelings toward yourself and other people can shift quickly.
Some common patterns include:
- Intense fear of rejection, abandonment, or losing an important relationship.
- Strong emotional reactions that can be difficult to calm.
- Relationships that become intense, conflicted, or unstable.
- Shifting between feeling very close to someone and feeling hurt, angry, or disappointed by them.
- Difficulty maintaining a stable sense of who you are or what you want.
- Feeling empty, ashamed, unlovable, or emotionally overwhelmed.
Laura Johnson, LMFT, LPCC, is a certified CBT and Schema Therapist with expertise in adults with borderline personalitytraits.Clients seek me out across California, including San Jose, San Francisco, Sacramento, Los Angeles, and San Diego, because of my unique approach. Schema therapy for borderline personality is a good fit for adults who are emotionally stable and ready to work on the deeper personality patterns underlying BPD.
Could I Have Borderline Personality Disorder or Traits?
You do not need to experience every symptom of BPD to struggle with borderline personality patterns. Some people have very visible emotional reactions, while others experience much of the distress internally.
You might recognize patterns such as:
- You become extremely anxious when someone important seems distant, upset, or unavailable.
- Small signs of rejection can trigger intense fear, anger, shame, or sadness.
- Your feelings about another person can change dramatically after you feel hurt or disappointed.
- You sometimes aren’t sure who you are, what you want, or how you really feel about yourself.
- You may become angry, withdraw, seek reassurance, or react impulsively when you feel rejected.
- You sometimes experience a persistent feeling of emptiness or loneliness.
What Is Borderline Personality Disorder?
Borderline personality is a personality disorder characterized by long-standing difficulties with emotion regulation, relationships, identity, and sensitivity to rejection or abandonment.I often think of BPD as involving an emotional system that can become activated very quickly. An interaction that another person experiences as disappointing may feel like profound rejection or abandonment. Once those emotions are activated, it can become difficult to access a more balanced perspective.
Common Symptoms of Borderline Personality
BPD looks different from one person to another, but common patterns can include:
- Strong sensitivity to real or perceived abandonment.
- Intense or unstable relationships.
- An unstable or changing sense of identity.
- Rapidly changing or intense emotions.
- Difficulty calming yourself once emotionally activated.
- Feelings of emptiness.
- Intense anger or difficulty managing anger.
Core Schemas I Often See with Borderline Personality
Schemas are deeply held patterns about yourself, other people, and relationships. They usually develop early and can continue shaping your emotional reactions long after the original circumstances have changed. Not everyone with borderline personality has the same schemas, but several are especially common.
- Abandonment/Instability: You may expect that people you love or depend on will eventually leave, reject you, become unavailable, or stop caring about you. Even small signs of distance can feel threatening and trigger intense fear or distress.
- Mistrust/Abuse: You may expect that other people will eventually hurt, betray, manipulate, deceive, or take advantage of you, making it difficult to feel secure even in close relationships.
- Defectiveness/Shame: You may have a deep sense that something is wrong with you or that you are fundamentally flawed, unlovable, or unacceptable to others.
- Emotional Deprivation: You may expect that other people will not truly understand you, care for you emotionally, or consistently provide the closeness and support you need.
Below are some common core beliefs I hear in people with borderline patterns. Yours may be somewhat different.
| Schema | Core Beliefs / Statements |
|---|---|
| Abandonment / Instability | “People I love eventually leave.” “If someone pulls away, I might lose them.” “I need to know that this relationship is secure.” “I can’t trust that someone will always be there for me.” |
| Mistrust / Abuse | “If I let my guard down, I’ll get hurt.” “People will eventually betray me.” “I need to protect myself before someone takes advantage of me.” |
| Defectiveness / Shame | “Something is wrong with me.” “If people really knew me, they wouldn’t love me.” “I’m not good enough to be loved the way I am.” |
| Emotional Deprivation | “No one really understands what I need.” “Other people won’t be there for me emotionally.” “I never get the love and support I need.” |
How Schema Therapy Helps with Borderline Personality
Schema Therapy was developed to help people change deeply rooted emotional and relationship patterns that may not fully respond to short-term approaches alone.Rather than focusing only on what happens when you become emotionally overwhelmed, we look at what is being activated underneath the reaction.
For example, when someone important doesn’t respond to a message, an Abandonment schema might quickly interpret the situation as rejection. Your Vulnerable Child may feel frightened or devastated, while an Angry Child or Impulsive Child mode may push you to react immediately.
In Schema Therapy, we work on changing these patterns through techniques such as:
- Cognitive techniques to identify and challenge deeply held beliefs about yourself and relationships.
- Imagery rescripting to work with painful memories and unmet emotional needs.
- Chair work to help different emotional parts or modes communicate in healthier ways.
- Behavioral pattern-breaking to practice responding differently when schemas and modes are activated.
Over time, the goal is to make your schemas less powerful, reduce unhealthy coping responses, and strengthen your ability to respond from your Healthy Adult mode.
When Is Schema Therapy Appropriate for BPD?
Schema Therapy for borderline personality is intended for people who are stable and ready to move beyond crisis management into deeper therapeutic work. If you are currently experiencing frequent suicidal crises, severe or ongoing self-harm, repeated psychiatric hospitalizations, or significant difficulty maintaining basic safety, you may need DBT, psychiatric care, or a more intensive level of treatment before beginning schema therapy with me.
Schema Therapy and DBT Address Different Stages of Recovery
Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) is an evidence-based therapy and the first line of treatment for borderline personality disorder. DBT can be particularly helpful when the immediate priorities are reducing dangerous behaviors, managing crises, tolerating distress, and developing emotion-regulation and interpersonal skills.
Many people come to Schema Therapy after completing a substantial course of DBT or another treatment that has helped them develop skills for managing intense emotions and maintaining safety. Schema Therapy can be valuable after you have developed greater stability but continue to struggle with the underlying schemas and emotional patterns that keep getting activated.
Why Work with Laura Johnson?
I specialize in helping people with borderline personality traits understand and change long-standing patterns involving emotions, relationships, and how they see themselves. Schema Therapy—my area of advanced certification—helps uncover and shift the deeper patterns that drive emotional dysregulation.
I’m one of the few therapists in California who is both an Advanced Certified Schema Therapist and a Certified Cognitive Behavior Therapist. I completed an intensive two-year postgraduate training at the Schema Therapy Institutes of New Jersey–New York City and am a long-standing member of the International Society of Schema Therapy. People from across California seek me out for my expertise in Schema Therapy for adults with borderline personality traits.
Frequently Asked Questions About Borderline Personality Disorder
Can people with Borderline Personality Disorder change?
Yes. BPD does not have to mean a lifetime of unstable relationships and overwhelming emotions. With appropriate treatment, people can develop greater emotional stability, healthier relationships, a stronger sense of identity, and more effective ways of responding to rejection, conflict, and other emotional triggers.
Is Schema Therapy effective for Borderline Personality Disorder?
Yes. Schema Therapy is an evidence-based treatment that has been specifically studied for Borderline Personality Disorder. It focuses not only on reducing symptoms but also on changing the underlying schemas, modes, and coping patterns that contribute to emotional and relationship difficulties.
Should I do DBT or Schema Therapy for BPD?
It depends on where you are in treatment. If you are struggling to maintain safety, experiencing frequent crises, or engaging in significant self-harm, DBT or a more intensive treatment program may be the more appropriate starting point. If you have developed greater stability and emotion-regulation skills but continue to struggle with deeper relationship, identity, abandonment, or shame patterns, Schema Therapy may be a useful next step.
Do I need to complete DBT before working with you?
Not everyone needs exactly the same treatment history. However, I work with BPD clients who have reached a stable stage of recovery and have adequate skills for managing intense emotions safely. Many clients have previously completed DBT or another substantial course of treatment. I will ask about your treatment history and current functioning before determining whether my practice is a good fit.
What if I currently struggle with suicidal thoughts or self-harm?
If suicidal crises or significant self-harming behavior are an active part of your current clinical picture, my practice is generally not the appropriate level of care. Your immediate treatment needs may be better addressed through DBT, psychiatric treatment, or a more intensive program focused on stabilization and safety. Schema Therapy with me may become appropriate later when you are more stable and ready to work on underlying patterns.
How long does Schema Therapy take?
There is no single timeline. Long-standing personality patterns generally take time to change because they have often developed and been reinforced over many years. I tailor treatment to your individual patterns, goals, treatment history, and progress.
Take the Next Step with Borderline Personality Disorder Therapy in California
With Schema Therapy, you can learn to manage the underlying patterns that contribute to emotional dysregulation and relationship instability and create a life worth living. I offer secure video therapy across California, including San Jose, Sacramento, San Francisco, Los Angeles, Orange County, and San Diego. Reach out today to get started.